Mi estancia

Oh dear blog readers, O have so much to share but time is passing me by and I cannot be planted on the comp all day long. So here is a snippet of my life here the past few weeks...filled with beauty, tough times and laughter.

Last night I just came back from a class with a midwife and four couples that are getting ready to give birth. It was so beautiful. The partera (midwife) was warm and welcoming funny and reassuiring. The couples were so in love and excited to be giving birth, I think all for their first times. They asked so many nervous questions..but the partera answered with such assurance and confidence. I did some of the excercies with them, and tears came to my eyes when the couples faced eachother and breathed deeply in and out. Each one of them looked so lovingly into the others eyes.

First thought was how so very beautiful that we get to experience such a thing as birth...what joy it brings, second was my heart yearning for that look, to give that look to someone that I love, the third was what a beautiful profession, to pause time in this moment of joy and happiness, that often is fleeting, for the rest of my life. sigh...I felt for the first time really that this is really what I want to do. as often these days I have been thinking why did I chose this path?? Am I really meant for it? What is my personal legend (alchemist)

I just returned Sunday from a ten day trip to Oaxaca with my host family. BEAUTIFUL. I was worried at first 20 hours in the back of a truck??? With a family that I have jsut barely gotten to know? But it turned out to be such a beautiful trip to a poor indigenous community. We stayed at the house of a friend of my host mother (who is an very active feminist/catholic activist!!!) who is also an activist but a teacher in the community as well, single which is rare but one of the most beautiful people I have met, strong, humble, giving. The last day she gave me one of her blouses as a gift. She is poor and the blouses are handstiched and cost about 40-50 dollars, what that ment to me she does not know.

During those ten days we danced danced and danced some more. There were two festivals we went to and for four nights we danced in a group of women, indigenous women in their traditional dress, and then my host mother, her friend and a group of other single young women from the pueblos. I couldnt have been more happy. all of us women dancing and loving it for hours on end. We went to the beach twice...ahh I havent been in so long. We ate ate and ate. Just sat and chatted, swung on a hammock, talked with her nephews whom I grew to love, listened to music together, sat in a circlñe outside over the fire as tortillas were being craftily flippes, talking into the wee hours of the mornings as darkness and smoke surrounded us....I was really sad to leave.

I am loving living with my host family. Every day is learning experience for me. My mother is so strong..tough, a little intimidating, but now that we have gotten to know each other better I am growing to really love her. She has so much to teach me, once a curandera herself, active in liberation theology, a feminist...what does it mean to be a feminist in Mexico? That I am growing to learn..it is much different than the US.

I have been so content. And so happy that I am not with a program. I am emmersed in Mexico, my family is so active in the community and they bring me everywhere, make me speak even though I feel like my spanish hasnt improved and I will never be able to understand fully what people are saying.....that is a slow camino and frustrating but I am improving. I have a mountain of cantacts from curanderas in the communities!!! The work beigns!

And that is my life in a snippet. How fast the time does fly as I am already preparing to leave for Chiapas!!